Thursday, December 1, 2011

Two Months

Baby Boy,

You kept teasing us with your gassy grins and the adorable half smiles you would give us as you fell asleep, and then you finally SMILED! I think babies can sense when moms need some payment for their many sleepless nights and their smiles come at just the right time :)

One night your dad got home from work late and you were already sleeping. He went into your room to give you a kiss and as he did you woke up. You looked him straight in the eyes gave him the biggest grin and turned over back to sleep. Pretty sure it made your Dad's LIFE!

Not only are you smiling but you are talking. You love to hear the sound of your voice and especially right after you eat, you will carry on for over half an hour. Every night as your dad sings to you, you look up into his eyes and sing along with him. It is my favorite moment of the day.

You are still our little snuggler and you can't seem to fall asleep unless its in our arms. You love being around people so much that you actually nap better if you are out in your swing where you can see me. If you momentarily stir in your sleep, you open your eyes and see you are still a part of the action and you are able to get back to sleep.

Speaking of the swing, you can't get enough of that thing. You don't even need to be moving but you could spend most of your day all snuggled in there. The other day, you discovered yourself in the mirror that hangs above and you were so thrilled by the darling face staring back at you.

Your Dad and I can't seem to get enough of you. You are still such a fun novelty in our house that since we can't seem to get enough of you while you are awake, once we put you to bed we have to get out our computer and camera and browse the thousands of pictures we have already taken of you

Keep being your adorable self Charlie, and you will continue to make me one happy lady.

Love always,


Tuesday, November 1, 2011

One Month

*I have always loved the idea of writing letters to my children every year for their birthday. My friend Janssen took this a step further and wrote a letter to her baby every month for the first year. Because I am not that clever, I am stealing her idea.

Dear Charlie,
The first week we had you at home will forever remain one of my fondest memories. Your Dad was able to take a whole week off work to spend with you and me and we had the most special time. Just the three of us, our own little family. We had nowhere to be and nothing to do except spend quiet moments holding you, singing to you, staring at your perfect features, and marveling at what kind of a little person you would grow up to be.

These quiet moments are often interrupted by your many grunts, and groans. You are the loudest sleeper! Any time you begin to wake up or make the slightest movement in your sleep, your face scrunches up, and you make these low long low grunting noises that sound like you are struggling to lift a 400 pound rock. Its sure hard work being a baby! For the first couple of weeks you slept in a bassinet right next to my bedside. Even though you slept great ( For the first week and a half, I had to wake you up to feed you. You were a little jaundice and the doctor wanted to make sure you were fed every three hours) I was up every few minutes awakened by your grunts or if I hadn't heard you for awhile I was awake to check on you and make sure you were still breathing. Because I leaned over on my side so much, propped up awkwardly on my elbow to check on you, I strained a muscle in my shoulder and arm. I still can't lift my right arm straight up!

You don't have much to complain about. In fact, you seem to dislike crying. As soon as we make any sort of attempt to make you more comfortable when you are crying, you immediately calm down, even it is not the actual solution to your problem. Of course we credit that to our excellent parenting skills :) You love to be cuddled ( as long as your arms are free), have something to suck on, and listen to music.

Everyone says that babies get more and more fun as they get older, but right now I am loving my snugly little newborn.

Love  Always,

Sunday, October 16, 2011

The Birth Story (G rated)

I promise I will not share any graphic details but I do want to record my labor and delivery experience and since I am a terrible journal writer this may be my only chance. And it is long :)

When I reached 36 weeks and started having weekly checkups, week after week I left sorely disappointed that my body was showing no signs of preparing for labor. At my 38 week appointment, I still had not dilated nor felt a a single contraction. I didn't want my baby to come early but I was anxious to know that the process was moving along.

One Wednesday, Sep 28, 2 days before I reached 39 weeks, I began feeling contractions at work. They were not consistent but I was excited/nervous that my body had started to prepare for my baby to come. By late evening, the contractions had started to speed up, coming about every 10 minutes apart. I started to feel anxious because I really did not want my baby to come early. My doctor was out of town until the following Monday and I still hadn't finished my last day at work. I knew I wasn't coming back after I had my baby and so I wanted to make sure I had tied up any loose ends.

Because the contractions were still so far apart, Blakely and I tried to get some sleep not knowing what the night would bring. Shortly after midnight, my contractions picked up to about 7 minutes apart. With Blakely's phone I kept track of how long they lasted and how far apart. The contractions were painful and long enough that I didn't get any sleep; just laid in bed waiting for the next one to come. At four o clock I woke Blakely up and told him what I had been feeling all night. My doctor had told me not to go to the hospital until contractions were 5 minutes apart for an hour but surely having contractions 7-10 minutes apart for 8+ hours had to count for something! Right?

After debating for half an hour about what to do, I finally decided to call the doctor on call. He sleepily answered my call and affirmed that yes, it was too early to go into the hospital. I felt certain though that my contractions would start speeding up so I made Blakely stay up with me. While I straightened my hair and put on my makeup, I made Blakely shave. I knew whenever this baby came, there was going to be lots of pictures and I wanted us to look somewhat alive even if we hadn't slept!

When six a.m. rolled around, I contacted work to let them know I wouldn't be making it to work and that hopefully I would be heading to the hospital at any moment. Blakely sent a few emails to let his coworkers know he would be working at home. And then we waited....and waited. By ten o clock the contractions had almost stopped altogether and Blakely decided he should head into work. After trying to take a nap, I decided to head into work as well and make sure I had cleared everything up. I was somewhat embarrassed about heading back to work after making everyone believe that I was headed into active labor but everyone was super kind and encouraging. Not knowing what turn my body would take, I completed all my last minute projects and turned in my work keys in case I was unable to make it back to work the next day. I said my goodbyes but still planned on returning on Friday for my final work day.

When I got home that evening Blakely and I did not want to spend our evening waiting to see if my contractions would start again so we called our friends Stephanie and Cameron, to get out of the house with us. We went for ice cream and a little shopping but I found myself extremely distracted knowing that I could be a mother by the next day!

The rest of the night played out as a repeat of the night before. We both settled into bed, not knowing what the night would bring but immediately the contractions returned. Throughout the night the contractions started speeding up from 10 minutes apart to 8 to 7 to 6. I tried to get some sleep in between  but I was only able to relax for a few moments before the pain would return. At six o clock the contractions were 5 minutes apart. I got Blakely up and told him it was time.

We gathered all of our things by the door including the car seat and sat on the couch to help us pass the time until the magical hour of 5 minute contractions completed. The contractions continued for 50 minutes and then all of the sudden they were 7 minutes apart. 9 minutes apart. 12 minutes apart. I was devastated. At this point in time I could care less that my doctor wasn't around; there was no way I could handle another sleepless painful night.

After Blakely returned to work after our second false alarm, I decided to go into the doctors office to be checked and see how much progress my body had made after two nights of continual contractions. The doctor filling in for my doctor was very sweet and made me feel completely validated for wanting to come in for an unscheduled visit. She informed me that I had dilated two centimeters and that whenever the contractions returned I should head to the hospital . She was the doctor on call at the hospital that weekend and she felt confident that I would have my baby before the weekend was over.

I felt extremely relieved that there was an end in sight. I reached home about 1 o'clock. I had only been home for about a half an hour when the contractions returned. This time with an intensity I hadn't experienced yet before, reconfirming my desire to receive an epidural. I waited a half an hour before trying to contact Blakely because I didn't want him to have to leave work for another false alarm but by two o'clock I couldn't handle being by myself anymore.

Even though I was still in a lot of pain, by the time we reached the hospital, I felt a sense of relief because I knew that before the night was through I would have my baby. When I was checked in I had dilated to a 4 and my contractions were about 4 minutes apart. I was anxious to receive my epidural but I had to wait another hour and a half to finish the monitoring and check in process. Any fear I had of my labor experience was laid to rest when I met the the labor and delivery nurse who would be taking care of me. With 35 years of experience, she patiently explained every step of the process and answered our hundreds of questions.

Blakely played the part of supportive husband perfectly; sacrificing his hand for me to squeeze everytime I had a contraction, voicing my concerns to the nurse, cheering me on when I needed extra encouragement, and appropriately adding comedic relief.

Receiving the epidural was everything I hoped it would be.Within minutes my pain had subsided and I was able to relax for the first time in days. Instead of painfully waiting, dreading the beginning of the next contraction, I was able to wait in anxious excitement for our baby to arrive. Blakely and I had planned on having hours of waiting in the hospital and came prepared with Blakely's laptop to watch movies and catch up on our favorite shows but within minutes, I was able to fall asleep.

The rest of the night is somewhat of a blur. After sleeping for 2 hours, the nurse woke me up at 8:00 to check my status. While I was sleeping, my body was hard at work and I was fully dilated to 10 centimeters. She left to grab the doctor and told me my baby would be here within the hour. I hardly had time to process before she returned and had me start pushing. Half and hour of pushing and our sweet, healthy baby arrived. With the umbilical cord wrapped around his neck twice, he came out BYU blue but any fear quickly subsided as we heard his first screaming cry.
Charlie Crawford Cragun: 7 pounds, 10 ounces, 19 1/2 inches long and completely perfect. Charlie is the first boy name Blakely and I liked when we first got married but I had dismissed it from our list until a couple of days before he arrived. His middle name comes from his Grandpa, Blakely's Dad. We like the triple "C".
Blakely and I were sincerely concerned we would have an ugly baby. We knew we would love him no matter what but we had a nagging fear that our baby was going to be funny looking. Our fears were quickly put to rest when studly Charlie arrived. I don't know how we pulled it off but we couldn't have hand picked a cuter new born.
Motherhood as been everything I hoped for and more. What an incredible blessing to have such a pure and innocent spirit in our home who is so close to our Heavenly Father. He has already brought more joy   into our lives than we could possibly imagine. I can't wait to watch what kind of person this little boys turns into.

Saturday, October 15, 2011


Despite the absence of updates on our our blog, 2011 was filled with the biggest change Blakely and I have ever experienced. We were privileged to welcome a perfect healthy boy into our lives: Charlie Crawford Cragun born Sept 30th 2011: 7 pounds 10 ounces, 19 1/2 inches long and super cute!

Blakely and I found out we were pregnant in February. After throwing up for the first time since I was nine years old, Blakely and I both knew I was going through much more than just a "bug". Since I was a teenager my body has never been regular, so we have had many pregnancy scares and I have taken over a dozen pregnancy tests (dollar store variety of course because who wants to spend 8 bucks on a test?) What a thrill to see not one but TWO lines! I can still remember the look of excited panic that filled Blakely's face when I exited the bathroom to reveal the results. We both wanted a baby but neither of us expected we would be blessed with one so soon!

Three pregnancy tests later (2 from the dollar store and one more expensive "reliable" one) I found myself frantically contacting my other pregnant friend for OB/GYN referrals. We were excited, nervous, overwhelmed and thrilled knowing there was a little person growing inside me.

Because Blakely and I are living in Texas and the rest of our family is in Utah, we wanted to come up with a clever way to announce the upcoming addition to our family. With the help of our dear friends the Warnocks, we set up a photo shoot, playfully mocking the common poses of newborn shots, and took pictures posing with a baby doll. We emailed this announcement to our family and close friends with hilarious results. We thought we were pretty clever :)

I was blessed to have what my doctor called the perfect pregnancy. Besides the one incident, I never threw up the rest of my pregnancy. I felt nauseous somedays and extremely exhausted many days, but I never had to miss a day of work. My weight gain and blood pressure remained normal. I was able to remain active and I slept great at night. And somehow I survived the hottest summer on Texas record. We had 90 days of 100 + degree temperatures and 160 days over 90 degrees and hardly a drop of rain but thanks to a hefty electric air conditioning bill and a nice pool in our apt complex I survived.

I can only cross my fingers my future pregnancies will go as smoothly. I will admit though since i was one of 16 women in my ward who had babies this year, it was impossible not to compare the size of my belly.
Five months along in Southern California to celebrate the wedding of our friends Chad and Allie.

Seven months along while I was visiting Utah this summer

Eight months along swimming at Barton Springs in downtown Austin. As mentioned earlier, I got a lot of use out this maternity swimsuit. Many thanks to my dear friend Katie for letting me borrow it.

8 1/2 months along with my dear friend Maren when she came to visit Austin. This was taken just two weeks before Baby Charlie arrived.

As I finish writing this holding my little one month old baby, being pregnant seems like a lifetime ago. I can hardly even remember what it feels like to carry a growing baby around all day or the pains of labor. I guess we are blessed to forget so we are willing to do it again for another :)

Sunday, June 26, 2011

Christmasing in Utah

I shall make no excuses for the tardiness of the following posts.

For Christmas, we were able to trek cross country back to Utah with our dear friends, the Knabs. Four adults in a 99 Saturn for 24 hours has recipe for disaster but somehow we made the trip safely and the Knabs still claim as friends.

The trip was made infinitely more fun with my early Christmas present Blakely gave me the night before we left.

Some of the highlights included:
  • Eclipse concert with Blakely's sisters and brother
  • Attending 2 BYU basketball games and watching the Jimmer JAM
  • Meeting up with dear elementary and middle school friends
  • Dominion parties
  • Our only snow shoveling and sledding experience of the winter season
  • Annual family Christmas parties, complete with a visit from Santa's Elf
  • New Years at the Oakley cabin
Annual "W.E.L.L." party. This is the only time during the year I get to see these dear friends.

Smith Family Christmas party at Grandma Julia's Condo. Santa was unable to make it this year but my Dad gladly filled in as the Christmas elf to deliver Santa's gifts.     
Smith Family Bannagrams: For the record my family is full of cheaters :)
Christmas morning with the Craguns.
Spending time with my some of our favorite littles :)

Grandma and Grandpa Cragun's Christmas village.
Sledding with the Cragun family.

We spent out last night in Utah ringing the New Year at the Oakley cabin playing in the snow and enjoying time with our friends. Thank you Tillotson's for your hospitality!